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Signs You're Too Clingy - Relationship Advice for Women

2010-10-04

One of the very worst things any man can ever say to us is that we're too clingy. It stings to hear that. It's also confusing. We may recognize the fact that we're a tad bit too possessive but when you totally love a man, it's hard not to be. But when does it cross over the line from wanting to be very close to him to being too clingy? There are some signs that being clingy is damaging the relationship.

One of the signs you're too clingy is you contact your man more than once or twice a day. Even in married or committed relationships, a couple doesn't often talk on the phone or email more than that. If you're dating a guy and you have a constant need to talk to him, that's a sure sign that you may be too clingy. That's even more pronounced if you're the one doing all the calling or you send the majority of the text messages. Less is always more when it comes to contact with your guy.

Do you ask your man a lot of questions about what went on during his day? It's obviously important to have an interest in what the person we love is doing, but it can subtly turn from interest to obsession. If you're asking questions about things like what he ate for lunch or who he talked on the phone to, that's edging into clingy territory. You may view this type of behavior as a desire to be close to the man you love. He likely sees it as akin to being stalked.

When you fish for him to tell you he loves you, that's another sign that you may be holding onto him too tightly. Men aren't always as open with letting us know how they feel. They tend to pace themselves when it comes to sharing their feelings so he may not say he loves you or cares for you as often as you'd like. If you find that you're asking him if he does frequently, he probably views you as being too clingy.

Jealousy is another of the signs you're too clingy and you need to adjust things a bit. Obviously, if you feel that your boyfriend is devoting too much of his attention to another woman you're going to feel envious of that. If that woman is just a co worker or a platonic friend, you have to learn how to temper your feelings of jealousy. Not wanting him to spend time with any other woman isn't healthy for the relationship and he'll view it as not only you being clingy but also you being insecure.

If you recognize any of these signs in your own relationship it's definitely time to take stock of your behavior. Being too clingy is destructive and you may come to realize that the man you are trying so desperately to hold onto to is leaving you because he feels smothered.

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